• A compromise is an agreement whereby both parties get what neither of them wanted. Anybody can win, unless there happens to be a second entry.
• Youth is a malady of which one becomes cured a little every day. He’s turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he’s miserable and depressed. • Always laugh when you can. It is cheapest medicine. • Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life. • An optimist is someone who falls off the Empire State Building, and after 50 floors says, 'So far so good!' • You can't have everything....where would you put it? • You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted, then used against you. • If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything. - Mark Twain • If you wish to live wisely, ignore sayings including this one. • Nothing can confound a wise man more than laughter from a dunce. ----Lord Byron • Join The Army, Visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them. • An consultant is someone who takes a subject you understand and makes it sound confusing. • If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side. • When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane. • You know the speed of light, so what's the speed of dark? • God is a comedian, playing to an audience too afraid to laugh. • It’s true that we don’t know what we’ve got until we lose it, but it’s also true that we don’t know what we’ve been missing until it arrives.